Louie Gohmert: Assward Ho!
Listen up Texas voters. It’s bad enough that this Nation has had to deal with two retarded Presidents from your state. Please stop sending your village idiots to Washington D.C. Case in point: One Louie Gohmert (R-TX 1st).
Another of the Lone Star State’s Asswards Ho Republican House Congressional members. As a member of the House Republican Caucus he claims to be fiscally responsible, yet wasted Congressional Resources with a lame stand-up routine performed on the House Floor; July 24, 2008, introducing his proposed bill, H.R. 6215:
Giving Inmate Terrorists More Opportunities (GITMO) Act of 2008
110th CONGRESS, 2d Session
H. R. 6615
To provide for the transport of the enemy combatants detained in Guantanamo Bay, Cuba to Washington, DC, where the United States Supreme Court will be able to more effectively micromanage the detainees by holding them on the Supreme Court grounds, and for other purposes.
IN THE HOUSE OF REPRESENTATIVES
July 24, 2008
Mr. Gohmert introduced the following bill; which was referred to the Committee on Armed Services, and in addition to the Committee on the Judiciary, for a period to be subsequently determined by the Speaker, in each case for consideration of such provisions as fall within the jurisdiction of the committee concerned
A BILL
To provide for the transport of the enemy combatants detained in Guantanamo Bay, Cuba to Washington, DC, where the United States Supreme Court will be able to more effectively micromanage the detainees by holding them on the Supreme Court grounds, and for other purposes.
Be it enacted by the Senate and House of Representatives of the United States of America in Congress assembled,
SECTION 1. SHORT TITLE.
This Act may be cited as the `Giving Inmate Terrorists More Opportunities (GITMO) Act of 2008′.
SEC. 2. FINDINGS.
Congress finds the following:
- The United States Supreme Court issued an opinion styled Boumediene v. Bush on June 12, 2008.
- Justice Anthony Kennedy, in the court’s majority opinion, held that foreign terrorism suspects held at the Guantanamo Bay naval base in Cuba have constitutional rights to challenge their detention in United States courts.
- This is an obvious effort on the part of the Supreme Court to micromanage the detainment and disposition of detainees in the War on Terror who are dedicated to destroying innocent people and the American way of life.
- The United States Supreme Court clearly needs increased opportunity to oversee the handling of the enemy combatants, as it has seen fit to take a greater role in managing the Global War on Terror, which is a duty previously exercised by the Executive Branch.
- There can be no better way for the United States Supreme Court to exercise its new self-appointed war powers than to house the prisoners whom it has taken a greater role in overseeing.
SEC. 3. TRANSPORTATION AND DETAINMENT OF ENEMY COMBATANTS.
(a) Transportation- The Secretary of Defense shall immediately transport all enemy combatants detained in Guantanamo Bay, Cuba to Washington, DC, where the United States Supreme Court shall hold the prisoners on the Court grounds, confined by adequate fencing.
(b) Shelter on Supreme Court Building Grounds- The Secretary of Defense, in conjunction with Justice Anthony Kennedy, the author of the majority opinion in Boumediene v. Bush, is directed to provide shelter for the detainees outside the United States Supreme Court building, but on the building grounds. The Secretary of Defense shall provide guards to watch over the prisoners and shall implement a system to ensure that the prisoners receive the appropriate amount of food and water. Should the detainees need the use of restroom facilities, they shall use the facilities inside the United States Supreme Court building. The Chief Justice, if the Chief Justice so chooses, may perform the duties of Justice Anthony Kennedy under this subsection.
(c) Guard Duty- If any of the nine Supreme Court justices desire at any time to stand guard over the prisoners, or to provide the prisoners with their meals or water, or both, then the justices shall be permitted to perform these functions whenever they want.
SEC. 4. ENFORCEMENT.
If either the Secretary of Defense or any justice of the Supreme Court refuses to carry out their duties under this Act, then their respective department or court shall receive funding for the next fiscal year at half the level of funding appropriated for the current fiscal year, or until such time as the Supreme Court no longer desires to micromanage the prisoners who have sworn to destroy our way of life.
For those of you who have let your minds become laden down with other people inanities, and may be wondering just what is wrong with this asininity of Gohmert’s; it’s unconstitutional from the git.
We haven’t got much to say about this other than: “Gee, it sure is nice that our congressmen get to use our nation’s resources to fulfill their thwarted comedic ambitions.” That and, “wow, this is hellza unconstitutional!” Like, old school unconstitutional (1792, baby!). We guess Rep. Gohmert wasn’t paying attention the day his Con Law class covered the fact that Congressional delegation of non-judicial functions to the courts is a violation of separation of powers?
Amanda and Kate, “Republicans Reap Benefits of Innovative Plan to Employ Incompetent Lawyers by Electing Them to Congress“, Wronging Rights blog, July 30, 2008
Then there is that little bit of unconstitutionality which underlies Gohmert’s fatuity: the theft of habeas corpus. There is also the Constitutional prohibition blocking the government’s taking of a human’s life, liberty and/or property without first securing a righteous conviction against in a trail that adhered to due process of law. Louie has an odd way of fulfilling his honourably sworn oath to Defend and Uphold the Constitution.
Is there anyone left in The State of Texas who still understands that the saddle horn is supposed to be facing the side closest to the horse’s head? This D grade stand-up comedy routine might be excusable, even for its waste of governmental resources, if it weren’t for the fact that Louie Gohmert has a past history of imbecility.
His Day Of The Living Transvestites opposition to H.R. 1592: Local Law Enforcement Hate Crimes Prevention Act Of 2007 was pure fantasy, although it was actually humourous. His proposed H.R.2509: To prohibit United States assistance to foreign countries that oppose the position of the United States in the United Nations, would be par for the course, if he was 10 years old, and decided to take his ball home, because he got stuck out in right-field where he wasn’t likely to do the team any harm.
Please, please please,Texas electorate, keep your damn fools in their 38qt Stetsons at home. Their afflictions of genitalia deficit disorder, notwithstanding.
Thanks to:
Ed Brayton, “Congressional Idiot of the Month: Rep. Louis Gohmert [R-TX]“, Dispatches From The Cultural War blog, August 1, 2008
for bringing this to our attention.
